A Reddit user revoked his friend’s access to a private apartment rooftop patio after discovering the friend had been repeatedly using the space for dates. The user, who posts under the handle Critical-Salary-4669, shared the story on the r/AITAPod subreddit to ask whether he was wrong to remove access without a second warning.
How the Arrangement Began
The situation started when the friend asked to bring a woman to the rooftop because his own building was under construction. The original poster (OP) agreed and provided guest access through the building’s app system.
Access Expanded Without Permission
Over time, the friend began using the patio far beyond the original agreement. OP discovered through the building app that the friend had used the guest access several additional times. The friend eventually admitted he had been bringing different women to the rooftop as part of his dating routine.
“I later realized through the building app that he’d used my guest access several more times. When I asked him about it he laughed and admitted he’d been bringing dates there because the rooftop had become his ‘secret weapon,'” the user wrote. “And based on what he told me he never corrected them when they assumed he lived in the building, which I thought was pretty weird.”
OP said he became uncomfortable with the continued use and wanted it to stop. He subsequently revoked the friend’s access. The friend later attempted to bring another date to the rooftop, only to find his entry code no longer worked.
Friend Reacts Angrily After Being Denied Entry
According to the post, the friend was upset and contacted OP after the failed date attempt.
“Apparently he had planned the whole date around the rooftop and suddenly had nowhere to take her, so they basically stood outside figuring out what to do next,” the user wrote. “Now he’s pissed because he says even if I wanted to revoke access, I should’ve warned him so he could make other plans. I think after being told to stop using someone else’s building for dates, you probably shouldn’t assume the code is still yours to use.”
Reddit Community Weighs In
The post garnered over 3,400 upvotes and 246 comments. The discussion centered on whether OP had an obligation to provide an additional warning before cutting off access.
Many commenters supported OP’s decision, arguing the friend had already crossed a clear boundary.
“Yep. Friend disrespected his boundary, then laughed in his face when told to stop. Simply taking back access required no further notification. In fact, having the friend be embarrassed on one random date was the perfect (and reasonable severity) way to let his friend know that OP is no pushover, and not to abuse his generosity in the future,” one user wrote.
Others criticized the friend’s behavior toward his dates.
“NTA. Your friend is shady and using your rooftop to lie to dates. He’s a douche,” the commenter wrote.
Several users noted that OP had already expressed discomfort, which should have served as sufficient notice.
“A normal person would understand that you saying you weren’t comfortable with him using it anymore was a warning,” one commenter wrote.
Ongoing Debate: Privilege vs. Permanent Arrangement
The thread largely debated whether the rooftop access constituted an ongoing arrangement or a revocable privilege. Most commenters viewed it as a privilege the apartment resident could withdraw at any time, especially after the friend ignored the initial request to stop.
The Daily Dot was unable to independently verify the events described in the Reddit post, which are based solely on Critical-Salary-4669’s account.
