Key Highlights
- A seven-month-pregnant Reddit user said her mother-in-law was pressuring her over how long she should breastfeed her unborn baby.
- The woman also described her sister’s disagreement with a mother-in-law over an ear-piercing ceremony for the sister’s baby.
- The Reddit post received 34 comments by publication, although The Daily Dot could not independently verify the claims.
Pregnant Reddit User Pushes Back Against Breastfeeding Pressure
A seven-month-pregnant Reddit user said she was frustrated by pressure from her mother-in-law to make decisions about her unborn baby’s breastfeeding routine. In a post shared on Nov. 11, the woman wrote that she was already being forced to defend parenting choices before her child had been born.
She said her mother-in-law brought up the woman’s husband’s cousin, who was still breastfeeding her 2-year-old. According to the Reddit user, her mother-in-law advised her to rest so that her bleeding would not start and her milk supply would last for two years.
The woman explained that she planned to return to work and hoped to continue breastfeeding once or twice a day after six months if that arrangement worked for both her and the baby. “I don’t even know what things will look like once my baby is here. Why am I already being compared to someone else and told how long I should breastfeed?”
Family Disagreement Over Baby Ear-Piercing Ceremony
The Reddit user also shared her sister’s experience with her own mother-in-law. She said the woman wanted the baby to have an ear-piercing ceremony in a crowded place and continued arguing after the sister expressed her objections.
“Her MIL insists it has to happen during the ceremony and keeps arguing about it. I feel for my sister. She said what she was comfortable with for her own baby, and somehow that became something she had to defend.”
The post questioned why parents in some families appear to need extended family approval for decisions involving their own children. The woman said the repeated need to justify boundaries was particularly exhausting. “The exhausting part is having to explain yourself over and over when you’ve already made it clear what you’re comfortable with.”
Reddit Commenters Advise Stronger Boundaries
Several commenters told the pregnant woman that her mother-in-law did not have authority over the baby’s care and suggested that her husband should address the issue with his mother.
“Stop explaining. Stop engaging. Seriously. Your MIL doesnt have any say in what you do with your baby. I would stop sharing information with her in regards to how you want to do things. Your husband should tell his mother to stop offering advice. When she doesnt stop, he says “mom, I asked you to stop offering advice and here you are offering advice, so we are leaving.” And you get up and leave.”
Another commenter described handling similar family situations differently while noting that experiences vary between families.
“I’m Indian and I don’t give a f— I give my husband a chance to say something and if he doesn’t I shut them down. Given that my in laws never really poke a nose in our business, I think experience can differ based on what kind of family you’re married into.”
A third commenter argued that the woman’s partner should take responsibility for setting limits with his family.
“Tell your PARTNER to tell his mommy to mind her own business – she is not a third person in your relationship and she is not a third parent to your child. It is his responsibility to handle his side of the family. Let him know that if he does not do so, immediately, you will, and he probably will not like the way you do it.”
Why This Matters
The discussion highlights how breastfeeding plans, infant ceremonies and other parenting decisions can become sources of conflict between new parents and extended family members. In this case, the pregnant Reddit user said she had not yet determined what breastfeeding would look like after the baby arrived, while her sister had already stated what she was comfortable with regarding the baby’s ear-piercing ceremony.
The post had drawn 34 comments as of publication. The Daily Dot could not independently verify the claims made in the post, and the identities of the commenters had not been confirmed.
Frequently Asked Questions
What was the conflict about breastfeeding?
The pregnant Reddit user said her mother-in-law compared her with a relative who was breastfeeding a 2-year-old and pressured her to rest so her milk supply would last for two years. The woman said she planned to return to work and might breastfeed once or twice a day after six months if it worked for her and the baby.
What disagreement did the woman describe involving her sister?
She said her sister’s mother-in-law wanted the sister’s baby to have an ear-piercing ceremony in a crowded place and continued arguing after the sister expressed her objections.
How did Reddit commenters respond?
Commenters encouraged the woman and her partner to set firm boundaries, share less information about parenting plans and have the partner address pressure from his own mother.
