TikTok creator Mike Cerroni offered a refreshingly relatable take on lottery daydreams in a video posted April 11, listing the painfully ordinary purchases he would make if he suddenly came into a windfall. The clip, shared under the handle @mike.cerroni, resonated widely, amassing 1.7 million likes and over 24,300 comments as of publication.
Debunking the ‘No Obvious Signs’ Meme
Cerroni opens by referencing the common meme of lottery winners insisting their lives would show no outward change. He immediately undercuts the fantasy, stating, “I, first thing I do, buy paper towels.” He jokes that he and his roommate, Linden, would be thrilled by the upgrade, noting they have been “drying their hands on their pants for a month.”
Administrative Wins: The DMV and Parking Meters
The creator’s second hypothetical stop is the Department of Motor Vehicles. Anticipating viewer assumptions about luxury cars, he mimics the questions: “Why did you go to DMV? Oh, maybe your new Lamborghini, your new Porsche?” The reality is far less glamorous: he would simply pay a vehicle registration that is two years overdue and get insured.
He adds that he would park on the street and feed the meter “for the f— of it,” declaring that compliance is the ultimate status symbol. “That’s how you know I won the lottery. If I just start following laws.” He summarizes his actual goal as simply becoming “a law abiding citizen.”
Everyday Luxuries: Guac, Dental Cleanings, and Streaming
Cerroni runs through a series of small, deferred maintenance items that highlight the gap between survival and stability:
- Chipotle Guacamole: Acknowledging the upcharge, he says “guac is cost extra,” but adds it “doesn’t make a dent” in the new budget.
- Dental Cleaning: He plans a routine visit, asking himself, “What’s wrong with your teeth? Nothing. Clean them.”
- Doctor Visit & Blood Work: He describes getting labs done just to see “what’s going on in there,” despite having no current symptoms.
- Personal Netflix Account: He wants to “watch my own movies and shows” rather than rely on a friend’s login, specifically so the friend “doesn’t know someone else is on his account.”
- Ad-Free SoundCloud: He mentions eliminating ads on the music platform.
The ‘Good Fridge’ Aesthetic and Impulse Buys
The list veers into aspirational domesticity. Cerroni describes a Whole Foods run for “a bunch of just organic vegetables,” specifically “weird colored organic vegetables.” He admits he might not eat them, keeping them solely to maintain “a good fridge.”
Other whimsical purchases include two glass bottles of Mountain Valley water (totaling $20) to pour into a Bearbrick-style fizzy drink container, and mouth tape—not necessarily to use, but to own. He compares the impulse to buying “a cowboy hat or some s—.”
Commenters Share Their Own Modest Dreams
The comment section became a forum for similar “financial stability” fantasies. One user wrote, “If I win, I’ll pay the full price in self checkout.”
Another highlighted debt relief as the ultimate luxury, writing, “Id [sic] answer the debt collectors calls and pay in full.”
A third commenter expressed alarm at the systemic implications of the dental cleaning line item, writing, “This made me so sad bro what is going on in America?? wdym go get a dental cleaning?? You’re SUPPOSED TO twice a year! Yall don’t????”
The Daily Dot was unable to independently verify the personal financial details described in this video, including the creator’s roommate situation and stated debts. The details above reflect the TikTok creator’s video as shared on TikTok.
